TFMR Stories

Termination For Medical Reasons Stories

On this page you will find stories of parents that decided to terminate a desired pregnancy for medical reasons.

I have included a handful of stories that were not terminations, because they are helpful stories to read as well.

The page is sectioned by diagnosis.

Please submit your story at this link, so parents going through this can read these stories ahead of time, gain knowledge and healing and support. Stories may be anonymous if you choose.

Trisomy 13

Stories about babies that had trisomy 13 and were terminated for medical reasons.

Trisomy 13 - The Story of Addison Faith

This is a story of a baby that had trisomy 13. Full trisomy 13.

She was born early (and not by termination).

She survived a few days.

It is an insightful story to anyone considering termination, however, so I wanted to include it here.

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Trisomy 13- The Story of Eden Lynne

"This date would put me at 20 weeks and 2 days.

If for some reason my husband and I had decided we wanted to terminate this pregnancy, we would have to do it before our appointment at MFM.

Earlier this year, Ohio passed a law banning abortions after 20 weeks gestation, regardless of a fatal diagnosis for the baby."

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April's Place

April Rey was induced early after learning of her full trisomy 13 diagnosis. Her entire story can be found at this link.

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CMV (Cytomegalovirus) 

Stories about babies that had CMV and were terminated for medical reasons.

CMV Virus: A Story of Loss and Hope and Love

An anonymous story of a baby that had CMV.

"My brain is ok with what I had to do, all of my doctors are in agreement with what I did, all of my family, friends are in agreement with what I did (those I've told). But my heart still aches and mourns for a daughter that I so so desperately dreamed of. She was going to be beautiful and smart and make my family complete."

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Turner Syndrome

Stories about babies that had turner syndrome and were terminated for medical reasons.

Turner Syndrome - The Story of Ellie-Mae

This Mama, tragically lost her baby girl, Ellie-Mae, to Turner syndrome. She made the agonizing choice to terminate for medical reasons. 

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Turner Syndrome- The Story of Lillian Faye

At the end of that first appointment they took blood to do the general genetic testing. Those results later came back negative for trisomy 18, 21 (Down Syndrome) and Turner Syndrome. We learned later that this was a false negative.

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Carpenter Syndrome

Stories about babies that had carpenter syndrome were terminated for medical reasons.

Carpenter Syndrome - The Story of Wyatt Easton Dryden

"We decided to terminate, and it was NOT a decision we made lightly.

To be honest, saying those words out loud to the doctor shattered my heart. I felt like a terrible person. I had lost my baby before I ever really got to meet him, and I loved him so much. More than words can truly express."

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Acrania

Stories about babies that had acrania and were terminated for medical reasons.

Acrania- The Story of Jaxon Parker Evans

"The doctor told me I needed to terminate immediately. In shock, feeling like I couldn't breathe, I ran out of there. I called my OB on the emergency line and explained to her what had just happened."

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Trisomy 18

Stories about babies that had trisomy 18 and were terminated for medical reasons.

Trisomy 18- A Story With The Wrong Initial Diagnosis

"While this was a terrible diagnosis, she explained the silver lining.  This was not something that A and I had passed on – it was a “fluke” and we had no higher chance of it happening again than anyone else my age. "

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Trisomy 18- The Story of Elijiah

"It was the HARDEST decision I’ve ever had to make, but when I thought about my son’s chance of survival, and not only that but what kind of life he would live if he made it, it just didn’t seem right to me to put such a tiny baby though that."

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Edward's Syndrome - The Story of Zoe Jane

This is the story of Zoe Jane. She was diagnosed with trisomy 18, Edward's Syndrome.

The doctor sat there with tears in her eyes and said "I'm giving you 2 shitty options," which was true because neither were what we envisioned for our baby.

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Trisomy 18- The Choice to TFMR

At first the doctor said that my anatomy scan came back abnormal for the baby. It appeared to be Down Syndrome or possibly spinal bifida.

I was devastated. I didn’t want my newborn baby to be sick. I never imagined this would happen. I never thought this would happen to ME. At 18.

I was thrown into a deep depression.

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Trisomy 18- The Story of Margot Faye

I might sound harsh but I’m in a support group that is filled with women who have or are going through the same thing as we did and we all feel silenced. Forced to grieve alone in fear of judgment, in fear of what reaction people might have when all we want to do is tell our story and be able to talk about the babies we lost.

So please, think about that before you say horrible things about people who choose this. They are most likely people who are close to you and are afraid to say anything.

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Brain Anomalies

Stories about babies that had brain anomalies and were terminated for medical reasons.

Brain Anomalies- The Story of Reagan Scott Rainville

Fast forward to that scan- our cheerful day turned into a day of pain, tears and fear.

Reagan’s ventricles had enlarged and it was questionable if her corpus collosum had developed.

A fetal MRI was ordered, and our physicians were puzzled. Nothing about Reagan fit a textbook.

How could our child who is so perfect, is measuring on scheduled, has 10 fingers and 10 toes, have something so wrong?

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Severe Ventriculomegaly - The Story of Breeze

"Did they think I was just another abortion?

I personally do not refer to my experience as an abortion. I’ve learned that other women also do not use this terminology.

I chose to label my experience as a termination of a very wanted pregnancy for medical reasons. The terminology is important."

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Microcephaly - Termination For Medical Reasons

I had the MRI and it took another week to hear results. It came back that the structure of the brain appeared normal, although it was small. But that didn’t necessarily mean that the brain was going to function as normal. It was frustrating that there was no clear answer to what was actually wrong, but we tried to stay positive.    

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Triploidy

Stories about babies that had triploidy and were terminated for medical reasons.

Triploidy- The Story of Zachary

"On the Wednesday, my mother drove us to the hospital and I started to think about how excited I was to pack my bag and go to the birth center and meet our little boy.

Instead the first wave of grief caught me off guard as I realized that I would go to the hospital with a baby and leave with a box."

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Triploidy- The Story of Jasper

I finally broke down to my husband and told him, “I can not let my baby suffer trying to live just so I can have him here. He will be in pain trying to survive in a world he wasn’t meant for.”

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Heart Defects

Stories about babies that had heart defects and were terminated for medical reasons.

Heart Defects- The Story of Sam

But I am not alone, Sam. I am part of a group of strong women and I've become friends with many through a shared loss.

I’ve heard countless stories of mothers who have walked solemnly and secretively in my shoes.

I know that I chose this path and this pain for you like they have.

I chose the pain so you wouldn't have to feel any.

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Multiple Cardiac Anomalies

Eventually, she stopped her work and told us, “I think there’s something wrong with your baby.”

We were left alone while she went to get a senior midwife and, honestly, I don’t remember if my husband and I even spoke in that time.

We’d both been hugely caught off guard.

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Anencephaly

Stories about babies that had anencephaly and were terminated for medical reasons.

Anencephaly- The Story of Faith Mackenzie Walker

I terminated my pregnancy, so my beautiful perfect daughter would never have to suffer.

She passed peacefully inside my womb, warm and completely surrounded by love!! 

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Renal Agenesis

Stories about babies that had renal agenesis and were terminated for medical reasons.

Bilateral Renal Agenesis-Peter's Story

They told me that my baby, that I had so longed for, wouldn't survive as he had developed without kidneys and was unable to produce amniotic fluid, and because of this his lungs also wouldn’t develop. I couldn't stop crying. I just held my baby bump and cried.

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Other Diagnoses

Stories about babies that had various other diagnoses and were terminated for medical reasons.

Why I Chose a D&E - Familial Dysautonomia

How could I be pregnant when my mom just died?

We were not planning on getting pregnant at this time. My entire world was upside down and I couldn’t comprehend anything that was happening. I had to now go back to work learning how to grieve and having this secret of being pregnant.

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Arthrogryposis Amyoplasia- The Story of Emilia

"And I could only mutter that 'she is broken her bones, her joints are all messed up.'

Moments later the doctor came back and explained everything to us. He explained how almost every joint in her little body was crooked and contorted, that she had a slim chance of making it full term, and, if she was lucky, she would spend her entire life having surgery after surgery just to look somewhat normal."

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Multiple Syndromes - The Story of Emma

"The doctor came into the room in such a hurry and was very concerned. He took a deep breath and started explaining that my sweet baby Emma had several different types of defects, and that he could not diagnose her with just one syndrome."

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Defects Caused by Accutane- Termination For Medical Reasons

Although it was hard, I am glad that my little munchkin didn’t have to suffer any pain, or any surgeries, or any limitating defects.

A peaceful pass, feeling no pain, but still loved as if with us still to this day.

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Placenta Infection - The Story of Teagan Wayne Mercer

"There is no foot too small to not leave and improve on the world.

Forever in our hearts."

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Share Your Story

I want to collect and share as many stories as we can so that we can break the silence and start supporting one another.

Share Your TFMR Story

Whether you choose to keep the post anonymous, or put your name and photo on it is completely up to you! I do hope, however, that you choose to share. That you choose to share your story with the world.

Share Your Story

Other Blogs about TFMR

Here You'll find even more stories and blogs about TFMR

Ida Saoirse

Photo Credit: nurturingmidwifery.weebly.com

The story of Ida (Trisomy 21)

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Amari's Place נְתַנְאֵל

Photo Credit: amariregan.blogspot.com

Amari's story (Fragile X)

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Greer’s Garden

Photo Credit: greersgarden.wordpress.com

Greer's Story (Amniotic Band Syndrome)

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The Valley of Daffodils

Photo Credit: thevalleyofdaffodils.blogspot.com

A fellow mom who TFMR at 20 weeks due to triploidy.

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Ending a Wanted Pregnancy

Photo Credit: endingawantedpregnancy.com

Stories and support for TFMR

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A Heartbreaking Choice

Photo Credit: www.aheartbreakingchoice.com

Stories and support for TFMR

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